Kelaine Conochan knows what every bride needs days before the wedding: just a quick email from a long-forgotten acquaintance.

The container was labeled HOT WATER. So why didn’t it taste like HOT WATER? Because you are a careless monster. A hellion. I hope you get what you deserve.

Ever feel like the whole world is out to get you? Ever feel like danger is around every corner? Maybe you’re just paranoid, or maybe you’re next to go.

The expression “comparison is the thief of joy” has never been more apt and righteous than in the social media age. Some advice on securing your valuables.

What makes you think you’re not good enough? You’re a king. You’re a beast. You’re a winner. What if you finally started acting the part?

College admissions essays ask us to “write about a time you faced adversity” or “your greatest achievement.” I’m here to keep it 100. I am not special.

If it were a calendar or a playlist, what would your 2017 look like? What I got wasn’t what I wanted or expected. Goodbye forever, 2017.

Watch out world! Morganza L. is an Elite Yelper who knows what she wants and is here to write about it. It’s love, OK? FINE. She’s lonely. But still, how was that froyo?

So, you’re the maid of honor. And now it’s your turn to give the wedding toast. Don’t let the haters get you down. It’s your time to slay.