I just want a place I can be comfortable, be myself, be free from all this fucking Arachnophobia. For the first time, the manspider speaks out.

ZACH ATTACK IS BACK! But is he fat Zach? Thin Zach? Healthy Zach? IS THERE ANY SUCH THING? Gotta read to find out, you b-holes!

So, David has a wife now. When you meet your ex-lover’s wife and children, you all have the same beautiful, awkward question. WHAT IF?

Every so often you can’t help but think about the one that got away. There’s always ONE thing that doesn’t work. But what if things had gone differently?

Meeting the family. It’s a big, uncomfortable step into foreign territory. But when someone is ready to let you in, it’s not just about your comfort zone.

As our Writer of the Year, Zach’s inner circle has grown notably more prestigious. But unfortunately, that means cutting the fat. Sorry Sting. You’re uninvited from ravioli night.

You go hiking. Into the woods, up the mountains, into the meadows. It’s just you and your notebook and your feelings. What’s inside when you’re outside?

You know exactly the type, don’t you? Square orientation food video. Something generic, simple, delicious, empty, and depressing.