Originally published on July 18th, 2016.
Frauds! Demagogues! Hedonists!
By the time you read this, I’m already gone. Long gone. Days, weeks, years? What difference does it make? You didn’t even notice until I was already too far away to hear your prayers.
You were too busy, too vainglorious to notice. Kneeling on your rugs facing the Holy Land, fasting till sundown. Pulling on your tzitzit, eating bitter herbs. Folding your hands quietly in the pew, eating your wafers.
Like I fucking care about symbolism. Like I fucking care about tradition.
You didn’t eat pork. You didn’t mix milk and meat. You gave up ice cream for 40 days. Congratu-fucking-lations.
Did you think that was enough? Did you think that was what I even asked for?
I gave you life. I gave you air. I gave you food and shelter. I moved continents for you. I gave you water and fire.
What more did you want from Me?
I gave you vegetables, and you complained that they were bland. So I gave you fruits, and they were too sweet. I let you hunt the beasts that I created. I let you gnash your teeth and eat animals like animals. You spilled their blood, but still you were ungrateful.
What more did you want from Me?
Oh, I heard your prayers. Every single one of them. And I answered them, but they never fucking stopped. I had plans. Grand plans. My own grand plans. Your prayers? Did you think you had better ideas than I?
I gave you reason, and you used it not to override but to justify your most depraved instincts. I gave you consciousness. Hearts. Souls. Strength. Each one its own burden. Or did you not think those came with responsibility? You seem to forget it is I, not you, who is weightless.
I gave you five senses. But you blinked, spat, and exhaled. You never listened. And when I tried to touch you, you pushed Me away.
I gave you bodies and you rested. I gave you time and you wasted it. You became lumps on a couch. You watched as celebrity metastasized. You hunched your shoulders over your phone and pretended the world was on your screen, but the world was all around you. You called it augmented reality, but reality was all around you. What augmentation did you need? What had I not given you?
What were you even looking for? Shall I ask it again? What more did you want from Me?
I gave you each other. But you abstained from love and called yourselves pious. Killed for doctrine and called yourselves martyrs.
I gave you each other. But still it wasn’t enough.
I gave you everything. You. Wretched as you are. And what did you ever do for Me?
Honor killings? Crucifixions? Crusades? I never asked for them. I never wanted them. You carried them out in My name, pretended it was My message, held your sacrifices up before Me and asked for My blessings.
You sociopaths. You infidels. You hypocrites!
You blessed each other when you sneezed and thought you were saved, didn’t you?
You misread, misheard, and misinterpreted everything I ever told you. Six thousand years of civilization, and you’re still doing the same shit. You won’t change. I know that because I know everything.
You’re all guilty. You’re all to blame.
You were sinners, but I tried to redeem you. You were flawed, but I tried to fix you. You were wrong, and apparently so was I.
You were My only mistake. Have you any idea how heavily that weighs on Me?
You wanted everything. And I am everything. So I gave you everything. And now there’s nothing left of Me.
I’m going to be fine. I am the earth and the sky and the deep blue sea. Motherfucker, I am the SUN. I am LIFE.
I made all this from NOTHING. I made all this when I was The Only One. The Only Thing. The Only Being. You think I won’t crack this fucking snowglobe and play with another toy somewhere else?
I’m done teaching lessons. I’m done with wrath. I’m done with penance and retribution and salvation.
You’re on your own.