Humanity for Habitat: An Alternative-Alternative {Spring Break}

Good afternoon students and thank you for letting us talk to you today about your Spring Break! Now, when most people think of Spring Break, they think of the jet setting, all-you-can-drink, tropical vacations popularized on MTV. Now don’t get us wrong, we want you to get out there and see the world. Being worldly is the new being on fleek! IRL!

Here on campus, we are so lucky to be a part of a diverse, politically charged, inclusive environment, but others are not so fortunate. Let’s get a show of hands… who here has heard of Habitat for Humanity? OK, great, that’s a lot. Anyone here planning on going on a Habitat Spring Break? Show of hands?

WOW! Good for you! As you know, Habitat for Humanity’s mission is to build homes, community, and hope.

The Humanity for Habitat^© Mission

But, I want to introduce another option for those who want to keep making the world better. We are Humanity for Habitat^©, an organization dedicated to constructing humanity in some of the places that already have habitats.

Humanity for Habitat^© works just like Habitat for Humanity, except that instead of building communities with our hands, we are going to be building communities with our minds and our voices. For example, take a look at this recent map of the United States.

What We Do

Humanity for Habitat^© wants to bring you hard-working, thoughtful, open-minded students into these states that have been shaded in with red, and reestablish humanity to them. They’ve already got the houses built, so time for us to swing through and teach them what it means to be a part of a community and a larger, accepting society.

These are places where humanity is so lacking that people are toppling gravestones in cemeteries, where rivers are being polluted by manufacturers, and where women’s rights are only being acknowledged when they are stricken from the law books. Can I get whoop whoop from all the women out here today who think they should have equal rights?

And now just the fellas supporting those nasty women! Whoop whoop one time!

Habitat for Humanity has been so successful in bringing people together by building up walls. And we here at Humanity for Habitat^© are trying to break down those walls, metaphorically, of course!

Our Progress So Far

We’ve already deployed a team to Iowa to explain to Representative Steve King the value of diversity, and another to Utah for a conversation with Jason Chaffetz about medical expenses for the average American.

Now we know… why go to somewhere like Georgia, when you could be on a tropical beach? Well, if we don’t start explaining how important and real science is, those beaches might not exist for much longer. We’ll set you up with all of the necessary materials so that you can explain to Georgians that if our coal emissions are left unregulated, then sea levels will continue to rise, drowning communities from Savannah to St. Mary’s. You won’t have to worry about your grandchildren inheriting oceanfront property when there’s no property left!

And all you journalism majors out there, don’t think for a minute that we could do this without you! We need your inquisitive energy in canvassing the Great Plains trying to renew trust in the press. And your empathetic spirit to explain that “saying what Rush Limbaugh thinks” is not unequivocally better than saying what is true. Think of it as a paper route, without the paper!

We know you have many choices when it comes to your Spring Break plans, but we hope in 2017 you choose to make the most of your week, for others. So this year, please consider Humanity for Habitats^©.