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No one knows what “shoot for the stars” means; we all just have bad aim

Listen to smart podcasts

Don’t date boring people who happen to be attractive

You should get those clothes tailored because you look ridiculous

Don’t buy lunch everyday at work

If you want to leave a good impression on people, send handwritten thank you notes

Develop an interest in something (cooking, reading, birding) so people know what gifts to buy you

Don’t date stupid people who happen to be attractive

No one likes a whiner

No one likes a vegan

You don’t have to be a full-on grown up right away

When someone says something hateful, always call them on it—no matter who or where they are

Say ‘yes’ to more opportunities than you decline

It’s okay to let friendships go dormant—sometimes they wake up, and other times they rest in peace

No one cares if your house is spotless, as long as you have good food and a comfortable couch

You’ll never regret going to the gym

Always tell people when they have something in their teeth, their clothes are on backwards, or if they have toilet paper stuck to them

We are all made of carbon and nothing matters, so just live a little

Having lots of friends is fine, but having great friends is much better

Date every other kind of person

When you feel powerless, just make an absurdist joke that only you (and maybe your sister) understand

Seek out the people, experiences, and creative works that actually move you

Never join Facebook

Kelaine Conochan

The editor-in-chief of this magazine, who should, in all honesty, be a gym teacher. Don’t sleep on your plucky kid sister.

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